香港/Vancouver I

from there

end up here

.... and now and then, a stance.
I was raised on a tiny island off Hong Kong, then moved about 50 times, each time to a more populated place, until I ended up here.
They both look beautiful, do they?

....現在, 然後, 不同立場。

我在香港附近的一個小島上出生長大, 然後搬了約50次, 

每次都搬到人口稠密的地方, 直到我來到這裡。

倆個看起來都很漂亮，對嗎？

溫哥華的秋天

欲說還休 欲說還休

哎吔天涼好個秋

Listen to the kids/聽聽孩子們

多倫多/Toronto

City view from Central Island

Kayaking in Lake Ontario

Downtown Toronto

Royal Ontario Museum

無論從任何角度來看多倫多, 它都是個美麗的城市!

No matter from what angle you look at Toronto. It's beautiful city!

Music everywhere in Vancouver

Beatles come alive at Robson and Granville

Two very talented kids at Granville and Georgia

Live jazz at Commercial Drive

Mother and son playing blues at Grandview Park

All the Louis Armstrong's classics at Union Street

Live jazz at Grandview Park

If you like music, Vancouver is definitely your city.

Hong Kong in the sixties/六十年代香港·三

The food were simple in those days. Lots of small eatout shop for wonton noodles,  beef stew noodles, Russian borsch and mix grills. There were good places for afternoon tea such as the Peak restaurant, Shatin cafe and Repulse Bay Hotel. Those who love to dance could go to Bayside nightclub, Hilton Hotel's Birds Nest and Peninsula Hotel's Godown disco.
Those were the golden days, young people worried the most was the term exams, the most troublesome was their relationship problems. It was not that all good,  the riots in 1967 scared a hell a lot of people. The young people suddenly all grew up, no longer lived in a dream, but had to think for the future. Soon after, someone left for England to study, someone left to Australia to work,  someone immigrated to US, and someone choose to stay in Hong Kong. They all went their separate way. The sixties had ended, while Hong Kong had embarked on another stage…

吃得也簡單, 小店裡的雲吞麵牛腩粉, 茶餐廳的羅宋湯什扒, 下午茶的好去處是山頂餐廳, 沙田茶座和淺水灣酒店, 愛跳舞的有碧瑤夜總會,希爾頓酒店雀巢和半島酒店地牢。
那段令人懷念的流金歲月, 年青人最擔心的是會考, 最煩惱的是感情問題, 也不是全是美好日子的, 六七年暴動嚇怕很多人, 年輕人一下子成長, 不能長此活在夢裡, 也要為將來前途打算, 不久之後, 有人去英國留學, 有人去澳洲就業, 有人移民美國, 有人留守香港, 從以風流雲散, 結束了六十年代, 而香港也踏‪上‬另一個階段…

—1997年7月1日發表在加華僑報

Hong Kong in the sixties/六十年代香港·二

Hong Kong City Hall Library · 香港大會堂圖書館

Days were simple, after school activities were reading at Hong Kong City Hall Library, watching matinee movies, television still under developed. If you like music, there was Huang Chi Heng's popular western songs or Hui Yi Lin Sunday's Special. If you like shopping, you could go to Ocean Terminal. If you like camping, you could go to Lantau Island. The young people were shy and innocent in those days, every day they waited outside the school gate for the girls, or sometimes wrote letters, poem or sent a gift of book to express their wishes. The most fashionable clothing were jeans, or university uniform brought back from the US. Girls wore miniskirts to attract attention. The wealthy ladies preferred tailor made Chi Fu.

日子簡單明淨, 課餘活動是去香港大會堂圖書館看書, 看廉價早場或公餘場電影, 電視在萌芽階段, 愛聽音樂的有黃志恆的歐西流行曲點唱, 有許綺年的星期美點, 逛公司的去海運大廈, 愛露營的去大嶼山, 年輕人靦腆純情, 天天在校門外等女孩子放學, 也有寫信寫詩送書來表達意思, 穿牛仔褲最為時髦, 從美國帶回來的大學校衣最受歡迎, 女孩子的迷你裙引來途人側目, 小姐太太們愛穿裁縫手工的旗袍。

Hong Kong in the sixties/六十年代香港·一

Hong Kong Tram ·  香港電車

Life was simple in Hong Kong in the sixties. Nobody spend thousands of dollars to eat abalone and shark fin, nobody bought 18K gold diamond Rolex watch, nobody wore European designers label fashion. The road traffic was slowly flow, and no Mercedes-Benz filled up the roads. The real estate market prices were reasonable. High school graduates could work in the banking business district, the University of Hong Kong or overseas university graduates could be management. The youth from lower income families could work as a factory apprentice but they still went to night school after work.

六十年代的香港, 生活簡單, 民風淳樸, 沒有人花幾萬元吃鮑參魚翅, 沒有人戴十八K金鑽石勞力士手錶, 沒有人穿歐洲名牌設計師衣服, 路‪上‬交通暢順, 沒有大量平治車充塞街道, 地產房屋價格合理, 中學畢業生可以在銀行商業區工作, 香港大學或外國大學畢業生回來即可當管理階層, 家境不好的青少年早出來做事, 大多數當工廠學徒, 但放工後晚上仍然上夜校。

Nicest things about Vancouver · 溫哥華的好處

One of the nicest things about living in Vancouver is the accessibility to all types of nature within a reasonable distance. Within one hour you can be sitting pretty on a vineyard sipping wine, you could be deep within a redwood forest or on the coast indulging in fresh oysters…

生活在溫哥華的好處是, 可以在合理的時間內參與不同類型的大自然活動, 一小時內可以去到一個葡萄園酒莊, 坐著享受好酒, 又可以走入紅木森林區內深處, 又或者在海邊食新鮮生蠔…

岸上的陌生人/Stranger on the Shore III

最後一次回到故居去, 碼頭早已被棄置不用久矣, 在島的另一端建立一個新的建築物, 在裡面等船, 再不用日曬雨淋, 然而再也看不到山光水色, 感覺不到海風徐徐送來, 混雜在等船的人群裡, 沒有一張是認識的臉。

經過這麼多年, 以為自己已經很堅強, 以為自己已經忘了很多人和事, 事實上, 在島上我發現自己回到以前一樣, 好像從來沒有離開過, 只是我環顧四周, 我已認不出任何人, 對這個我生于斯長于斯的地方而言, 我只是一個陌生人…一個過客。

—1995年2月1日發表在加京華報

The last time I returned to the island, that dock was no longer used. On the other end of the island, there’s new terminal, where you can wait inside, out of the sun and the rain. But there’s no longer the view of mountainous islands or the feel of the soft sea breezes. I mingle among the waiting crowd, but there’s not a single face I recognize. In fact, I find I have returned to the same position I was before. It feels as though I’ve never left, and yet I can’t name anyone here. In this island where I born, I’m the stranger… a mere passerby. 

—published in winter 2019, Brick magazine

岸上的陌生人/Stranger on the Shore II

Paris

New York

Amsterdam

因為看書的原故, 愈發覺得眾人言語無味, 島居侷促狹窄, 恨不得快高長大, 遠走高飛, 用鷹的眼光來觀看小島以外的世界。

小島上, 一般年紀的女孩子有好幾十個, 將來的命運也都差不多, 都是等不及長大就結婚生子, 然後留在家裡帶孩子做家務, 做些手作幫補家用, 閒時打麻將說是非, 生命還未開始就完結了, 我對自己說我不要這種生活, 我的將來也不僅止如此, 有一天我會離去, 找尋我理想的生活, 我還年輕, 還有這麼多的事情要學要做, 還有這麼多的地方要去。
現在要找的東西都找到了, 要去的地方都去過了, 在北美洲一個小城安頓下‬來, 做我喜歡的工作, 閒時讀書, 繪畫, 寫作, 聽音樂, 看電影, 做瑜伽, 去旅遊, 過著我童年夢想的生活, 應該感恩才是, 然而....

—1995年2月1日發表在加京華報

Because my reading, I found everyone’s chatter more idiotic, the island more narrow-minded, and I couldn’t wait to grow up, to escape and see the world with the eyes of an eagle.

On the island, dozens of girls my own age shared the same fates. All of them couldn’t wait to grow up and marry and have children, then to stay home with the little ones and the housework, taking on some piecework to bring in something extra, playing mah-jong in the spare hours and going to mass. It’s a life that is over before it’s begun. I told myself, I don’t want that kind of life. That will not be my future. One day I will leave to find it. I’m still young, with things to do and places to go.

Now, all I’ve ever desired, I have. All the cities I wanted to see, I’ve seen. I’ve settled in a small North American city doing the work I was meant to do. My free hours are filled with reading, painting, writing, listening to music, watching movies, doing yoga, travelling, living out the dream life of my childhood. I should appreciate it, and yet…

—published in winter 2019, Brick magazine

岸上的陌生人/Stranger on the Shore I

老是做一個奇怪的夢, 因為故居在一個島上, 到市區去自然要乘船, 夢裡總是氣呼呼趕至碼頭時, 小輪船剛好拉過氣笛, 吐着濃煙冉冉離去, 這個夢的潛意識裡代表是什麼? 弗洛伊德和容格信徒又會作怎樣的心理分析? 準是沒有安全感之故, 怕錯過了, 實在又錯過些什麼? 去了還有下一班, 又趕着去哪兒呢?

而夢境又那麼清晰, 像看一幕電影凝止了的鏡頭, 畫面上一角‪由‬高漸低沉入海的山, 背景是溶在一起的天和水, 前景是空架在水上的碼頭, 小輪船漸行漸遠, 一個女子仍然站在碼頭上, 四裡無人, 只有她和她的瘦長的身影…
還有背景音樂呢, 是比利渥爾用西簫演奏的岸上的陌生人,
我在這兒站着, 看着潮水漸退, 是如此孤寂與落寞…

從小是個孤寂的孩子, 最愛下課後躲在校園一角看書, 在樹影婆娑下, 蟬鳴聲裡看完戰爭與和平, 悲慘世界, 水滸傳, 西遊記, 沉迷在書中的故事裡, 也不知道時日快過, 直至祖母喊叫吃晚飯, 才迷迷糊糊從情節裡走出來, 啊, 書中日月長...

—1995年2月1日發表在加京華報

There's a dream that always comes to me because my home was once an island. So whenever I had to go into the city, of course I had to catch the ferry. In this dream I'm racing to the ferry dock just as the small steamer sounds its whistle and pulls away in a cloud of smoke. What could my subconscious be trying to tell me? What mighta psychological analysis, in the vein of Freud or Jung, reveal? Perhaps I had no sense of security and feared missing everything. Yet what could I have possibly missed? There would be another ferry, and another, and besides, why was I in such a hurry? Where was I going?

The dream is so vivid, as vivid as watching a movie shrunken down, with the corner of the screen crushed into the sea by the immensity of the sky and mountains. In the background, the sky and waves dissolve together, and in the foreground is the empty dock, the ferry puttering off, its path aslant on the waves until it grows fainter and fainter. I see my own figure still standing on that dock, not a soul for miles, only a girl and her skinny shadow. Just as in a film, I hear the strains of Acker Bilk's "Stranger on the Shore" in the background, the words welling up within me: "Here I stand/Watching the tide go out/So all alone and blue/ Just dreaming dream of you...

I was a solitary child. After school, I tucked myself away in some corner of the school yard, under the spreading branches of the shadow trees and the buzzing cicadas, to plunge into War and Peace, Les Misérables, Outlaws of the Marsh, or The Journey to the West, so lost in the story that I didn’t feel the day fly past until my grandmother called me for dinner. I came back out of the story, where the day had felt so long...

—published in winter 2019, Brick magazine

 

Please believe in miracle · 請相信奇蹟

I left Hong Kong when I was barely twenty. No collection, no one pick me up at J.F.Kennedy. The old man sat beside me couldn't speak a word in English, so I ordered everything for him and we chatted about our life story. When he found out I had no place to stay in New York. He took me home with his family. The rest is history.

離開香港的時我二十歲, 沒有任何接觸, 沒有人在肯尼迪機場接我, 坐在我飛機上旁邊的老人家不會說英語, 所以我照顧他的飲食, 我們聊起生活的故事, 當他發現我在紐約無處可居留, 他把我接回家與他家人同住, 以後的就是歷史。